My decision to become a Health Coach was one in a long line of self-healing tools and therapies I embraced to reconcile aspects of my childhood I felt were hurtful and damaging to my development. The more work I did on myself, the more those issues surfaced and the more difficult it became to be in the space of the source of those conflicts. And not just because I was working on that old stuff, but because the outcome of that work was making others around me uncomfortable.
They were uncomfortable with who I was becoming because it meant having to deal with their own stuff. I work(ed) really hard not to push my agenda on anyone, not when I was a complete vegetarian, not when I began a Kundalini Yoga practice, and not even when I decided that the lifestyle I had been conditioned to aspire to was not the one I wanted to live.
But then, and still now, I have to confront this discomfort on a daily basis, because my lifestyle choices appear to reject the actual people in my life who helped make me who I am.
And it can be very difficult to operate from a space of Love when you’re dealing with that, or any other issue, like neglect, abuse, abandonment, violence, money, sickness and death within family or social dynamics.
There are three things that I do as both an act of self-preservation and as a way to be compassionate and loving towards the person I am in conflict with.
First, I look at where I how I am contributing to the conflict and take responsibility for how I handle our exchanges. After I put myself in check, I look to see the conflict is arising out of a lack of self-love, jealousy, or a fear of the unknown, and perhaps all three. I tell myself that these issues are not about me, but are a projection of whatever isn’t happening for that person in their life at the moment.
Second, I recite the Prayer of Love, Peace and Light for myself and for them (prayer to follow). By doing so, I am “putting the mask on myself first
” and then reaching out to help the other person.
Finally, if it’s just impossible for me to create a healthy space, I create a healthy distance between myself and the other person, or cut them out of my life completely.
By taking these steps, I maintain my boundaries and can continue doing my self-healing work.
Self-love is an integral part of setting a loving intention for people in your life (and even for those you are not acquainted with), so if you find this particular intention difficult, please go back to the Self-Love intention and spend a moment reflecting on what that means for you.
Perhaps there might be some self-healing work that you need to do in order to be open and loving to people in your life and this is a good time to get started on that.
Prayer of Love, Peace, and Light
Love before me
Love behind me
Love at my left
Love at my right
Love above me
Love below me
Love unto me
Love in my surroundings
Love to All
Love to the Universe
Peace before me
Peace behind me
Peace at my left
Peace at my right
Peace above me
Peace below me
Peace unto me
Peace in my surroundings
Peace to the Universe
Light before me
Light behind me
Light at my left
Light at my right
Light above me
Light below me
Light unto me
Light in my surroundings
Light to the Universe
This prayer was given to me by one of my spiritual teachers, Joseph Michael Levry of NAAM Yoga. I hope that it bestows upon you a renewed sense of love, light, and happiness.